Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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