i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
