Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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