literally had 100 drinks last night.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
