i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
