kristin has been a bad kristin
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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