Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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