Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
