this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
