sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
