I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
