As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
