Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
i just google imaged poop.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
