Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
