Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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