I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize