Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
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