I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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