What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
