They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
