Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize