it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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