He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
