Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize