I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
