his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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