You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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