I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize