I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize