are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
