would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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