Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
