How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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