Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
