I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
