It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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