That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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