Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I just want to make out with him forever
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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