Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
