My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize
