i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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