I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
