Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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