Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
