What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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