That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
