You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
