I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
