just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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