Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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