if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
